Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2016 19:03:12 GMT
PETER EUGENE KIRKLAND
male | 15 |
english | demisexual |
175cm | 72KG |
pureblood | |
personality
[attr="class","profileboxscroll"]Much of what Peter once was has been robbed from him by Loraine. formerly a playful and energetic young lad, his youth has been leeched from him by years of neglect. How can he manage a smile or a laugh when all he's ever wanted wants nothing to do with him? Thus, Peter can be described as an ultimately somber boy. He's surprisingly quiet and focused, opening up only in the presence of his dearest brothers or his closest friends, whomever they may be. As a child in his first and second years, Peter defended himself in this way. After all, if he couldn't trust his mother to be kind to him, what could he expect from the rest of the student body?
Thankfully, Hogwarts is a far gentler mistress than the Kirkland matriarch. Though unsurprising, Hogwarts has been absolutely integral in the further development of Peter's most prominent qualities while serving to effectively squelch what is unneeded. Age accomplished this as well, for at only fifteen years he's managed to pull together something that resembles a respectable young man. This could also be a result of a latent desire to still be what Loraine would have wanted: a powerful wizard, a true gentleman worthy of the Kirkland name. He understands his situation, but something within him yearns futilely. He will never be what the family wants him to be, and he must make a name for himself.
Above all else he is determined to be the best that he can be. Determined not to be the failure expected of him, but to defy all odds and expectations. This has created a fabulous work ethic. Even though he may not be the top of the class and his grades aren't perfect, it can be guaranteed that he will try his best no matter what the situation or subject. Peter cannot stand the idea of losing or quitting. To him, to do either of these things merely confirms what he has always known - never mind how true these things may be.
This does mean, however, that Peter is a sore loser. Perhaps his opponent did not cheat, but it nonetheless means that his best effort was not good enough to propel him to victory. He is old enough now to stop himself from crying, but he will take to isolating himself when he feels like he needs to gather himself. The emotions his freedom from family allow him to have still refuse to be let loose.
Beneath these qualities, however, lies the soul of a boy who's been torn apart by his suffering. What torture Arthur sought to protect him from Loraine still managed to inflict, but in a different, more subtle way. Being abandoned by his mother left deep lashes in Peter's heart, and not without careful nurturing would they ever heal. He craves attention and loathes being ignored. He will go out of his way to impress others, sometimes at the expense of his pride. He lacks the self-preservation of a normal child and may attempt dangerous things just for a laugh.
He struggles with his anger and his bitterness. He loves Arthur still, but he has not yet forgiven him for allowing Loraine to manipulate him the way she has. He would contend that Arthur's avoidance has only done more damage, as Peter still shakes when he thinks about all the things he has lost and will never regain. Despite the mask he places over his face, Peter weeps internally, struggling with a lack of self-confidence that ultimately cripples his belief in his future. He dreams of fame with no guarantee that he will ever achieve it, with no assertion that for someone like him this is possible.
He is not an unkind young man, but he fears abandonment. His hell is silence, the quiet that comes with being ignored by the people who are supposed to love him. Befriending him is difficult, if only because he fears his friends will eventually leave him. Who can he trust in the world when his own mother left him? His eldest brother Iain seems to be the only person he puts any faith into, knowing that he once felt the same rejection. Inwardly, however, he resents Iain's good fortune. He may be rejected, but he is not invisible. He has family.
Peter has no one, and he is immensely jealous of this fact. Despite the love he holds for the man he idolizes, he cannot help but envy him.
Curiously, Peter finds himself in a position to be immensely loyal to the people he has given his trust to. The difficulty involved in obtaining the full scope of his dedication is so great that to achieve such is to become part of Peter's most precious inner circle. These are people he will defend to the very end, knowing that sometimes a single person can mean all the difference in the world to someone in need. He has resolved thus to give to others what he was always denied.
In this one can see Peter's true virtue. He is truly brave, though bravado is too present, but Peter seeks to challenge what causes him fear. This is born of a need to prove himself to not just the world, but also himself. He refuses to let his character be determined by cowardice and through sheer force of will can provoke his feet to move forward against the deadly whirlwind that threatens to sweep him away. This lot he's been given in life has made it clear to Peter that he can accept nothing from himself but the very best. If he cannot please others the least he can do is please himself.
He is caught somewhere between selfish and selfless, but one cannot blame the boy for craving what others might take for granted. He has seen the worst people have to offer and has suffered for their lack of quality character, but taking into these clear wrongs into consideration he has been taught through his own feelings that he should not inflict them upon another person. It hurts too much to fathom. He wants what others have, but cannot be brought to take them for himself.
He has been weakened by his suffering, but this has also brought with it great strength. He is used to the hardship and despite the negative effect it has on him he seems to thrive in it. The drive he has been given powers him through the depression that otherwise would destroy him. Each moment he spends awake he must fight with himself to do what he knows he needs to. Fate must find humor in his predicament, but it is not without pity. His trials have been rewarded fittingly.
It is strange the way his qualities intertwine. He is trapped between between a conglomeration of conflicting qualities, pulled in several directions by things that threaten to tear his form asunder. It is with some humor that Peter's wand is Hornbeam, perhaps due to some strange foresight on the wand's part. His needs have grown substantially over the years, and were he to be asked of his aspirations for the future he will gladly tell with, you no hesitation, that he hopes to be famous.
He knows not how he'll achieve this, but he does knows that someday he'll make someone proud. One day he won't be invisible.
Thankfully, Hogwarts is a far gentler mistress than the Kirkland matriarch. Though unsurprising, Hogwarts has been absolutely integral in the further development of Peter's most prominent qualities while serving to effectively squelch what is unneeded. Age accomplished this as well, for at only fifteen years he's managed to pull together something that resembles a respectable young man. This could also be a result of a latent desire to still be what Loraine would have wanted: a powerful wizard, a true gentleman worthy of the Kirkland name. He understands his situation, but something within him yearns futilely. He will never be what the family wants him to be, and he must make a name for himself.
Above all else he is determined to be the best that he can be. Determined not to be the failure expected of him, but to defy all odds and expectations. This has created a fabulous work ethic. Even though he may not be the top of the class and his grades aren't perfect, it can be guaranteed that he will try his best no matter what the situation or subject. Peter cannot stand the idea of losing or quitting. To him, to do either of these things merely confirms what he has always known - never mind how true these things may be.
This does mean, however, that Peter is a sore loser. Perhaps his opponent did not cheat, but it nonetheless means that his best effort was not good enough to propel him to victory. He is old enough now to stop himself from crying, but he will take to isolating himself when he feels like he needs to gather himself. The emotions his freedom from family allow him to have still refuse to be let loose.
Beneath these qualities, however, lies the soul of a boy who's been torn apart by his suffering. What torture Arthur sought to protect him from Loraine still managed to inflict, but in a different, more subtle way. Being abandoned by his mother left deep lashes in Peter's heart, and not without careful nurturing would they ever heal. He craves attention and loathes being ignored. He will go out of his way to impress others, sometimes at the expense of his pride. He lacks the self-preservation of a normal child and may attempt dangerous things just for a laugh.
He struggles with his anger and his bitterness. He loves Arthur still, but he has not yet forgiven him for allowing Loraine to manipulate him the way she has. He would contend that Arthur's avoidance has only done more damage, as Peter still shakes when he thinks about all the things he has lost and will never regain. Despite the mask he places over his face, Peter weeps internally, struggling with a lack of self-confidence that ultimately cripples his belief in his future. He dreams of fame with no guarantee that he will ever achieve it, with no assertion that for someone like him this is possible.
He is not an unkind young man, but he fears abandonment. His hell is silence, the quiet that comes with being ignored by the people who are supposed to love him. Befriending him is difficult, if only because he fears his friends will eventually leave him. Who can he trust in the world when his own mother left him? His eldest brother Iain seems to be the only person he puts any faith into, knowing that he once felt the same rejection. Inwardly, however, he resents Iain's good fortune. He may be rejected, but he is not invisible. He has family.
Peter has no one, and he is immensely jealous of this fact. Despite the love he holds for the man he idolizes, he cannot help but envy him.
Curiously, Peter finds himself in a position to be immensely loyal to the people he has given his trust to. The difficulty involved in obtaining the full scope of his dedication is so great that to achieve such is to become part of Peter's most precious inner circle. These are people he will defend to the very end, knowing that sometimes a single person can mean all the difference in the world to someone in need. He has resolved thus to give to others what he was always denied.
In this one can see Peter's true virtue. He is truly brave, though bravado is too present, but Peter seeks to challenge what causes him fear. This is born of a need to prove himself to not just the world, but also himself. He refuses to let his character be determined by cowardice and through sheer force of will can provoke his feet to move forward against the deadly whirlwind that threatens to sweep him away. This lot he's been given in life has made it clear to Peter that he can accept nothing from himself but the very best. If he cannot please others the least he can do is please himself.
He is caught somewhere between selfish and selfless, but one cannot blame the boy for craving what others might take for granted. He has seen the worst people have to offer and has suffered for their lack of quality character, but taking into these clear wrongs into consideration he has been taught through his own feelings that he should not inflict them upon another person. It hurts too much to fathom. He wants what others have, but cannot be brought to take them for himself.
He has been weakened by his suffering, but this has also brought with it great strength. He is used to the hardship and despite the negative effect it has on him he seems to thrive in it. The drive he has been given powers him through the depression that otherwise would destroy him. Each moment he spends awake he must fight with himself to do what he knows he needs to. Fate must find humor in his predicament, but it is not without pity. His trials have been rewarded fittingly.
It is strange the way his qualities intertwine. He is trapped between between a conglomeration of conflicting qualities, pulled in several directions by things that threaten to tear his form asunder. It is with some humor that Peter's wand is Hornbeam, perhaps due to some strange foresight on the wand's part. His needs have grown substantially over the years, and were he to be asked of his aspirations for the future he will gladly tell with, you no hesitation, that he hopes to be famous.
He knows not how he'll achieve this, but he does knows that someday he'll make someone proud. One day he won't be invisible.
history
[attr="class","profileboxscroll"]At one point in his life, Peter might have been destined for greatness. Born to a father who was never there and a mother who held him in chains, Peter's first few years of life were filled with love as only a child who has never known anything else could see. Illusions can easily be dispelled though. Being ignored might have protected him from the more foul practices of her dedication and obsession to a cause, but ultimately, in true Kirkland fashion, Peter's life has nonetheless been miserable. He is the forgotten failure; a son so worthless even speaking to him is a waste of time and breath.
Such was not the case in the beginning. His birth, as the birth of children tend to be, was an event that caused a great deal of excitement to ripple through the family. Peter, as he would be named, was the second child of Loraine and Elliot Kirkland, born three years after Arthur. It was in this tender years that the boys experienced the absolute best that Loraine had to offer as a parent, but even that was relatively lacking when compared to others. Being of her own blood Loraine was far more willing to treat them with the love of a mother, cooing gently as they played and admiring the work that she'd created. To her they were slabs of marble just waiting to be crafted into something glorious.
As a young child he was well-adored by both his mother and his older brother, but the former's motivations for such affections could be guessed as something far more malicious than they should have been. Playfully dragging her son away from the baby lest he smother him with love, Loraine was delicate in her handling and doting nonetheless. Her rage emerged only when the eldest of the Kirkland brothers appeared, sullying the perfection she intended with his mere presence.
The reasons for her hatred Peter would not understand until many years later, but in his earliest years he found himself in the same kind of position Arthur was in: blind idolization as only a sibling could be capable of. His brothers were the most powerful people in the world to him, as he lacked a proper father figure to fill the otherwise empty niche. Elliot was by no means a terrible father, for he loved all of his children with equal ferocity despite the women who birthed them. He was simply not around as much as he should have been, leaving the care of his two youngest boys up to his most recent wife.
Unfortunately, this was the absolute worst decision he could have made.
Loraine intended to turn at least one of her boys into the heir. He would be a powerful wizard, unrivaled in skill and intelligence. He would be a perfect gentleman, respectful while commanding respect. At first glance she appeared as a harsh and strict woman who wanted the best for them. She wished to instill proper work ethic and behavior befitting their noble blood. To the casual onlooker, to the rest of the Wizarding World, she was a perfectly reasonable parent, with normal behavior as those of the most prominent noble houses were oft to act.
When she began to formally teach young Arthur, she took to separating him from Peter. Up until this point the boys had been incredibly close. Their age gap was small in comparison to the elder and second eldest from among Elliot's other children, and thus the two boys grew up together being friends and companions in a great many endeavors. This had been so from the very earliest moments of Peters life when Arthur, ecstatic at the prospect of a younger sibling, would tote the toddling lad along grasping his hand firmly so as not to lose him.
At this point, at only five years of age, Peter was seen by Loraine as a distraction. Arthur would rather play than study, and Peter was a temptation that could scarcely be resisted. This became even more apparent upon Iain's returns home. He was always welcomed by his brothers, at least, until finally he stopped coming home. Iain had moved back in with the family upon graduation, but had other studies to pursue. His presence became more and more of a rarity as he left to continue expanding his budding business until finally he ceased returning at all. Arthur returned to his studies quietly and Peter remained alone, left in the care of household staff while his mother tutored and criticized his only friend.
His first taste of invisibility occurred at an age when he was too young to properly understand it. Though lonely beyond measure Peter was a good child, hoping that one day things would get better. At the very least the young Peter was offered newfound freedom - within reason. Though no longer concentrating her efforts upon him, Loraine's eyes were nonetheless hawk-like in their watching of him, keeping him from potential troubles.
Upon Arthur's leaving for Hogwarts, Loraine turned her sights to Peter. He began his schooling with Loraine at the age of eight, just as Arthur had, learning how to be the most perfect Kirkland he could be. He was drilled in etiquette and manners. He was made to memorize history and family members. He was made to know every inch of the Kirkland bloodline, how to address others both equal and lesser - the latter generally meant pretending they didn't exist. Peter, however, was a cooperative boy. He was an eager learner, desiring only to please. He'd been given the chance to earn her attention and love again. She was his mother, he could do nothing else but this.
The day Peter got his letter inviting him to attend Hogwarts was quite exciting for him. The last three years had been difficult and exhausting. By the time he turned eleven Peter was fulled prepared to be away from Loraine, due both from the desire to attend the same school as his brother, and also to get what would have been a much-needed mental break from her overbearing nature.
After an uneventful trip to the castle, which dwarfed all of Peter's expectations and imagery, he was escorted with the rest of that year's new arrivals to the Great Hall and was introduced to the house system that would both change and ruin his life. He waited with a great deal of anxious anticipation as surnames were called up in alphabetical order. He could feel several eyes upon him as he carried himself to the old stool and sat upon it.
The hat was lowered to Peter's head and it sat there uncomfortably, threatening to slide down over his eyes at any moment. He wasn't sure if the hat's deliberations were audible only to him or to the rest of the school, but as it spoke to him commenting upon his begging for Slytherin (out of the need to impress his family) a pregnant pause followed. Peter stewed in his growing anxiety until, against all odds and expectations, the hat shouted 'Gryffindor!' Peter froze. He swore at that moment he felt his heart stop, his body chill and go numb. He was nudged from the old stool and towards the Gryffindor table, where he was greeted enthusiastically by his new peers.
He didn't eat at all when the feast began and rejected any attempts at friend-making made by the other Gryffindors. When escorted to the tower with everyone else, Peter isolated himself from the others in the common room, immediately taking quill to parchment to write home. He poured his feelings onto the paper. He apologized, made promises, wiped his eyes free of tears so they wouldn't stain the letters. He waited weeks for a response, but never got one.
He'd hoped that the owl just got lost along the way, or lost the letter.
He'd sent several more after that, but never got any responses. It wouldn't be until he returned home for Christmas did he discover the full extent of his accidental transgression. Loraine spoke not a word to him. In fact, she didn't lay her eyes upon him past the scornful glare she gave him as he appeared with Arthur waiting to be retrieved from the train. His attempts to address her were met with absolute silence, as though he wasn't even there. Only months earlier was she still attempting to train him. The house he'd been sorted into had rendered the last eleven years of his life pointless. If she had her way, he wouldn't even be part of the family.
Sooner or later she would slip and speak to him, he thought, and this was true. But she rarely spoke to him at all unless she was screeching at him for something. He was not her child. He was a nuisance. He was an odd, unwelcome child living in her home. She got better at ignoring him, though. Come summer break she'd manager to perfect the art and soon Peter was living at Kirkland manor associating with literally no contact - unless Elliot appeared, at which point the unbearable quiet was broken by the one individual who still saw him as a son.
Perhaps the one silver lining Peter could see in all of this was that his abandonment had brought him closer to the brother he thought had disappeared. Iain, as it turned out, had been a professor at Hogwarts and knew of his plight. He was about the only person Peter could really confide in, and he was the only person, for the first year of his schooling, that Peter could bear to open up to. By the time he was nearing Christmas break of his third year, Peter could no longer return to Loraine and asked if he could stay with Iain instead.
Iain must have understood, because he agreed.
Peter found some solace in Quidditch. He tried out for the Gryffindor team as soon as he was able and managed to land a spot as one of the team's beaters. He grew quickly, as though willing himself to be bigger for his team. As a result the young man he is now is not to be underestimated in terms of strength, but the reality is that Peter's Quidditch prowess is largely credited to his created the spot as a method of venting his frustrations at the world. Surprisingly, getting to hit things at other people is therapeutic.
Peter excelled at Quidditch far more than he did his academic subjects. It takes a great deal of effort of Peter's part to master his academics, but Quidditch seems to come to him relatively naturally. He thus hopes one day to be able to use the skills he's acquired to play for a national team, thus obtaining the fame and recognition he so badly craves.
Quidditch, however, didn't solve his family problems. Arthur too had begun completely avoiding him, sparing words only when it was necessary. He'd been completely alienated by almost everyone he once loved.
By his fifth year, Peter had all but completely given up hope. He had his brother, and if he needed he had a home. He was no longer capable of returning to his parents and even if he was, his mother never paid him any mind. He'd been written off as a failure before he'd even been given a chance. His grades were respectable, his skills worth some pride. Despite his misfortune he'd made a name for himself in the school as a talented Quidditch player. And yet, for all of his, he was a failure.
What might have broken others fueled a flame inside of him. Deep within his heart were was a burning determination to rise above what fate had given him. He would never be the Kirkland heir. At this point, he did not want to be the heir. He would not seek out affection from a family that did not deserve him. He'd all but been disowned, and he would embrace this as the best thing that could have happened to him. Her corruption and her abuse were now readily apparent.
He would be better than the heir. He would surpass him in all things and deny the family the better child. Arthur had been sculpted into the image Loraine demanded, but Peter would make of himself a person of greatness with no amount of effort but his own, through the strength of his willpower.
And he would prove her wrong.
Such was not the case in the beginning. His birth, as the birth of children tend to be, was an event that caused a great deal of excitement to ripple through the family. Peter, as he would be named, was the second child of Loraine and Elliot Kirkland, born three years after Arthur. It was in this tender years that the boys experienced the absolute best that Loraine had to offer as a parent, but even that was relatively lacking when compared to others. Being of her own blood Loraine was far more willing to treat them with the love of a mother, cooing gently as they played and admiring the work that she'd created. To her they were slabs of marble just waiting to be crafted into something glorious.
As a young child he was well-adored by both his mother and his older brother, but the former's motivations for such affections could be guessed as something far more malicious than they should have been. Playfully dragging her son away from the baby lest he smother him with love, Loraine was delicate in her handling and doting nonetheless. Her rage emerged only when the eldest of the Kirkland brothers appeared, sullying the perfection she intended with his mere presence.
The reasons for her hatred Peter would not understand until many years later, but in his earliest years he found himself in the same kind of position Arthur was in: blind idolization as only a sibling could be capable of. His brothers were the most powerful people in the world to him, as he lacked a proper father figure to fill the otherwise empty niche. Elliot was by no means a terrible father, for he loved all of his children with equal ferocity despite the women who birthed them. He was simply not around as much as he should have been, leaving the care of his two youngest boys up to his most recent wife.
Unfortunately, this was the absolute worst decision he could have made.
Loraine intended to turn at least one of her boys into the heir. He would be a powerful wizard, unrivaled in skill and intelligence. He would be a perfect gentleman, respectful while commanding respect. At first glance she appeared as a harsh and strict woman who wanted the best for them. She wished to instill proper work ethic and behavior befitting their noble blood. To the casual onlooker, to the rest of the Wizarding World, she was a perfectly reasonable parent, with normal behavior as those of the most prominent noble houses were oft to act.
When she began to formally teach young Arthur, she took to separating him from Peter. Up until this point the boys had been incredibly close. Their age gap was small in comparison to the elder and second eldest from among Elliot's other children, and thus the two boys grew up together being friends and companions in a great many endeavors. This had been so from the very earliest moments of Peters life when Arthur, ecstatic at the prospect of a younger sibling, would tote the toddling lad along grasping his hand firmly so as not to lose him.
At this point, at only five years of age, Peter was seen by Loraine as a distraction. Arthur would rather play than study, and Peter was a temptation that could scarcely be resisted. This became even more apparent upon Iain's returns home. He was always welcomed by his brothers, at least, until finally he stopped coming home. Iain had moved back in with the family upon graduation, but had other studies to pursue. His presence became more and more of a rarity as he left to continue expanding his budding business until finally he ceased returning at all. Arthur returned to his studies quietly and Peter remained alone, left in the care of household staff while his mother tutored and criticized his only friend.
His first taste of invisibility occurred at an age when he was too young to properly understand it. Though lonely beyond measure Peter was a good child, hoping that one day things would get better. At the very least the young Peter was offered newfound freedom - within reason. Though no longer concentrating her efforts upon him, Loraine's eyes were nonetheless hawk-like in their watching of him, keeping him from potential troubles.
Upon Arthur's leaving for Hogwarts, Loraine turned her sights to Peter. He began his schooling with Loraine at the age of eight, just as Arthur had, learning how to be the most perfect Kirkland he could be. He was drilled in etiquette and manners. He was made to memorize history and family members. He was made to know every inch of the Kirkland bloodline, how to address others both equal and lesser - the latter generally meant pretending they didn't exist. Peter, however, was a cooperative boy. He was an eager learner, desiring only to please. He'd been given the chance to earn her attention and love again. She was his mother, he could do nothing else but this.
The day Peter got his letter inviting him to attend Hogwarts was quite exciting for him. The last three years had been difficult and exhausting. By the time he turned eleven Peter was fulled prepared to be away from Loraine, due both from the desire to attend the same school as his brother, and also to get what would have been a much-needed mental break from her overbearing nature.
After an uneventful trip to the castle, which dwarfed all of Peter's expectations and imagery, he was escorted with the rest of that year's new arrivals to the Great Hall and was introduced to the house system that would both change and ruin his life. He waited with a great deal of anxious anticipation as surnames were called up in alphabetical order. He could feel several eyes upon him as he carried himself to the old stool and sat upon it.
The hat was lowered to Peter's head and it sat there uncomfortably, threatening to slide down over his eyes at any moment. He wasn't sure if the hat's deliberations were audible only to him or to the rest of the school, but as it spoke to him commenting upon his begging for Slytherin (out of the need to impress his family) a pregnant pause followed. Peter stewed in his growing anxiety until, against all odds and expectations, the hat shouted 'Gryffindor!' Peter froze. He swore at that moment he felt his heart stop, his body chill and go numb. He was nudged from the old stool and towards the Gryffindor table, where he was greeted enthusiastically by his new peers.
He didn't eat at all when the feast began and rejected any attempts at friend-making made by the other Gryffindors. When escorted to the tower with everyone else, Peter isolated himself from the others in the common room, immediately taking quill to parchment to write home. He poured his feelings onto the paper. He apologized, made promises, wiped his eyes free of tears so they wouldn't stain the letters. He waited weeks for a response, but never got one.
He'd hoped that the owl just got lost along the way, or lost the letter.
He'd sent several more after that, but never got any responses. It wouldn't be until he returned home for Christmas did he discover the full extent of his accidental transgression. Loraine spoke not a word to him. In fact, she didn't lay her eyes upon him past the scornful glare she gave him as he appeared with Arthur waiting to be retrieved from the train. His attempts to address her were met with absolute silence, as though he wasn't even there. Only months earlier was she still attempting to train him. The house he'd been sorted into had rendered the last eleven years of his life pointless. If she had her way, he wouldn't even be part of the family.
Sooner or later she would slip and speak to him, he thought, and this was true. But she rarely spoke to him at all unless she was screeching at him for something. He was not her child. He was a nuisance. He was an odd, unwelcome child living in her home. She got better at ignoring him, though. Come summer break she'd manager to perfect the art and soon Peter was living at Kirkland manor associating with literally no contact - unless Elliot appeared, at which point the unbearable quiet was broken by the one individual who still saw him as a son.
Perhaps the one silver lining Peter could see in all of this was that his abandonment had brought him closer to the brother he thought had disappeared. Iain, as it turned out, had been a professor at Hogwarts and knew of his plight. He was about the only person Peter could really confide in, and he was the only person, for the first year of his schooling, that Peter could bear to open up to. By the time he was nearing Christmas break of his third year, Peter could no longer return to Loraine and asked if he could stay with Iain instead.
Iain must have understood, because he agreed.
Peter found some solace in Quidditch. He tried out for the Gryffindor team as soon as he was able and managed to land a spot as one of the team's beaters. He grew quickly, as though willing himself to be bigger for his team. As a result the young man he is now is not to be underestimated in terms of strength, but the reality is that Peter's Quidditch prowess is largely credited to his created the spot as a method of venting his frustrations at the world. Surprisingly, getting to hit things at other people is therapeutic.
Peter excelled at Quidditch far more than he did his academic subjects. It takes a great deal of effort of Peter's part to master his academics, but Quidditch seems to come to him relatively naturally. He thus hopes one day to be able to use the skills he's acquired to play for a national team, thus obtaining the fame and recognition he so badly craves.
Quidditch, however, didn't solve his family problems. Arthur too had begun completely avoiding him, sparing words only when it was necessary. He'd been completely alienated by almost everyone he once loved.
By his fifth year, Peter had all but completely given up hope. He had his brother, and if he needed he had a home. He was no longer capable of returning to his parents and even if he was, his mother never paid him any mind. He'd been written off as a failure before he'd even been given a chance. His grades were respectable, his skills worth some pride. Despite his misfortune he'd made a name for himself in the school as a talented Quidditch player. And yet, for all of his, he was a failure.
What might have broken others fueled a flame inside of him. Deep within his heart were was a burning determination to rise above what fate had given him. He would never be the Kirkland heir. At this point, he did not want to be the heir. He would not seek out affection from a family that did not deserve him. He'd all but been disowned, and he would embrace this as the best thing that could have happened to him. Her corruption and her abuse were now readily apparent.
He would be better than the heir. He would surpass him in all things and deny the family the better child. Arthur had been sculpted into the image Loraine demanded, but Peter would make of himself a person of greatness with no amount of effort but his own, through the strength of his willpower.
And he would prove her wrong.
rp sample
[attr="class","profileboxscroll"]For what reason did Peter bother to spend effort on such a thing? It was foolishness. Folly. He knew this and refused to accept it, because what sort of mother could do this to her children? He absolutely could not fathom it. Iain passed words down to him like heirlooms waiting for the next worthy hand, "Don't waste your time."
He had given her more than enough, and she him. The past was not so easily washed away, but it was clear to him and his elder brothers than memories were very easily tampered with and led astray. What he mistook for love was grooming. The expectations she held for her two sons were not those of a parent helping her children aim for the best, but nudging them forward to help her live vicariously.
He was meant to succeed in case Arthur failed, but he failed before he even started.
Quill scratched paper, the tremble of his fingers clearly visible in the calligraphy lain down upon parchment. The confessions he made were ugly to him. They were the sins of a child who knew only that his placement within the school was not what should have been. He was following in the footsteps of elders long erased from the family - not officially, but enough to challenge Peter's conceptions of the brothers that came before him.
Gryffindor.
The quill spat the word as if it were poison, the pitch-stained tip digging into the 'r' and bleeding ink through the parchment's veins. He followed up immediately with an apology and a promise to do better, to make her proud despite the error in the Sorting Hat's judgment. He would try his very hardest to be worthy of the Kirkland family, to earn his place.
He never got a response. He imagined she'd read his letter in a fury, tossing it into the fire and proclaiming him dead to her, and these thoughts were immediately thrown aside. It simply wasn't true. Her stepsons she could hate. They were not related to her. She had that much for an excuse. Why should she love or respect those not even kin to her? Peter was different; flesh and blood, a child she bore herself. Surely this would make a case for loving him regardless?
Arthur already spoke to him very little. He was berated if he did. He was too busy studying at Loraine's command and Peter was a distraction. But now... now, Peter was avoided. Arthur averted his eyes when they were in each other's presence, as if so much looking at his younger brother would cause the wrath of God to fall upon him.
Nonetheless, the hat was not wrong. Loraine's grooming could not hope to mask his greater qualities. 'Brave,' the hat proclaimed, 'sometimes too brave. Immense loyalty to those you love, a determination to do right by them. Your mind screams Slytherin but dear boy, you fit not with them but elsewhere. You'd better achieve your dreams as part of... Gryffindor!"
The Gryffindor table burst into applauding, welcoming their newest member into their ranks as the hat was removed and he was ushered onto the floor, eyes wide and brain frozen from the shock. There were people back home waiting eagerly to hear of his success, so clearly this had to be incorrect, right?
The lad would eventually find himself back in the tower to write this message, wiping tears onto his sleeve and fearing the disappointed remakes he'd hear upon returning home. The others of Gryffindor's newest additions spoke eagerly with their seniors, but not Peter. He stayed far away as he was instructed, as a Slytherin should. He was the only one among them who refused to participate for the longest time. Among his peers were many who were excited to meet everyone and he rebuked their every advance, settling himself uncomfortably in the dorms he didn't belong in.
It seemed so long ago now... a mere two years, in reality. His resolve had been shaken. His foundation had been compromised so many times. It was made clear upon returning home that he was no longer wanted.
He had given her more than enough, and she him. The past was not so easily washed away, but it was clear to him and his elder brothers than memories were very easily tampered with and led astray. What he mistook for love was grooming. The expectations she held for her two sons were not those of a parent helping her children aim for the best, but nudging them forward to help her live vicariously.
He was meant to succeed in case Arthur failed, but he failed before he even started.
Quill scratched paper, the tremble of his fingers clearly visible in the calligraphy lain down upon parchment. The confessions he made were ugly to him. They were the sins of a child who knew only that his placement within the school was not what should have been. He was following in the footsteps of elders long erased from the family - not officially, but enough to challenge Peter's conceptions of the brothers that came before him.
Gryffindor.
The quill spat the word as if it were poison, the pitch-stained tip digging into the 'r' and bleeding ink through the parchment's veins. He followed up immediately with an apology and a promise to do better, to make her proud despite the error in the Sorting Hat's judgment. He would try his very hardest to be worthy of the Kirkland family, to earn his place.
He never got a response. He imagined she'd read his letter in a fury, tossing it into the fire and proclaiming him dead to her, and these thoughts were immediately thrown aside. It simply wasn't true. Her stepsons she could hate. They were not related to her. She had that much for an excuse. Why should she love or respect those not even kin to her? Peter was different; flesh and blood, a child she bore herself. Surely this would make a case for loving him regardless?
Arthur already spoke to him very little. He was berated if he did. He was too busy studying at Loraine's command and Peter was a distraction. But now... now, Peter was avoided. Arthur averted his eyes when they were in each other's presence, as if so much looking at his younger brother would cause the wrath of God to fall upon him.
Nonetheless, the hat was not wrong. Loraine's grooming could not hope to mask his greater qualities. 'Brave,' the hat proclaimed, 'sometimes too brave. Immense loyalty to those you love, a determination to do right by them. Your mind screams Slytherin but dear boy, you fit not with them but elsewhere. You'd better achieve your dreams as part of... Gryffindor!"
The Gryffindor table burst into applauding, welcoming their newest member into their ranks as the hat was removed and he was ushered onto the floor, eyes wide and brain frozen from the shock. There were people back home waiting eagerly to hear of his success, so clearly this had to be incorrect, right?
The lad would eventually find himself back in the tower to write this message, wiping tears onto his sleeve and fearing the disappointed remakes he'd hear upon returning home. The others of Gryffindor's newest additions spoke eagerly with their seniors, but not Peter. He stayed far away as he was instructed, as a Slytherin should. He was the only one among them who refused to participate for the longest time. Among his peers were many who were excited to meet everyone and he rebuked their every advance, settling himself uncomfortably in the dorms he didn't belong in.
It seemed so long ago now... a mere two years, in reality. His resolve had been shaken. His foundation had been compromised so many times. It was made clear upon returning home that he was no longer wanted.
other
Wand | |
dragon heartstring | HORNBEAM |
13 1/4" | Hard |
Strongest Subject | Weakest Subject |
DIVINATION | |
Familiar | Patronus |
TOAD | albatross |
sealand from hetalia | |
misso | |
width: 1px;[/newclass]
